God bless The Apple for making us some seriously good goods, but, they've really got to keep their vanity in check. As much as their slick, clean designs work for the majority of their users, there will always be a rebellious cohort, like myself, who can't wait to break in their beloved piece of equipment.
That, amigos, is a quarter sitting on top of my iPod nano, which is just SO FRIGGING TINY. It's cute, obviously, and packs a ton of sound as I would expect my nPod to do, but, seriously, it holds like zero weight into my ginormous purse, so I'm already expecting to forget it on the regular. Plus, my headphone cord is literally heavier than the entire Nano device, so I sorta forget that it's tagged onto the end, making it feel really fragile. :( I can't use the white earbuds because they won't stay in my huge lady ears.
But the real question is: how am I supposed to make this thing MINE? I'm pretty big on personalizing my tech so that they scream "N-POD" and people will know that I've staked my claim damn clearly, but I'm having a tough time with this one. AND SO, I TURN TO ETSY.
If you haven't seen the movie "Inception" and have not seen Lady Gaga's "Born This Way" video, you should mosey on to the next post, hombre. Otherwise I'mmabout to blow your mind across +6 dimensions that don't actually exist.
LEVEL ONE: Lady Gaga's "Born This Way" Video
Hells to the yes, Queen Gaga's "Born This Way" video is out. Here it is, in all its glory!
And now, let us now discuss the influences in this video. First: Space, as it pertains to the future of sexuality? Or the plane of thought for young people today? Or, as it pertains to BOWIE? ON A NEW TRIPPY INCEPTUAL LEVEL?
LEVEL TWO: Bowie and Space Oddity
Uhm, is THIS really Bowie's original video for Space Oddity?
Those space women are so gorgeous -- thank GOD (aka Nicki Minaj) wigs are back and not just in Baltimore. A friend's response to this video is "wow, bowie has bad teeth in that video." ....Foreshadowing, are we?
Back to Level I: BTW Video.
Another theme: Rebirth. Whoa, graphic depictions of stretched skin and possible mirrored fellatio/birth?? Did I just see something obscene or just some stretched plastic? This theme isn't subtle, since the beginning calls out reincarnation. This feels Madonna-Ray-of-Light-y....[ERROR: Cannot find entry point into Next Level of Inception. ]
Another possible theme: Mexican "day-of-the-deadish". Skeletons, macabre, people are dancing and sort of sexually want to eat you? Zombies but not the new zombies, you know? Celebratory mood -- sorta kinda on this theme?
Oh, WAIT, did you hear that Gaga also dyed her hair?
LEVEL TWO (again): Striped and Skeletal
Is that a Daphne-Guinness stripe, or is that a Britney-style shaved spot? This is also a pretty interesting shot of Daphne with the Gaga-style skeletal hand...
Also, do you know about this skeletor-obsessed artist named HR Giger? [VAN BEGINS TO FALL]
LEVEL THREE: HR Giger
HR Giger makes all kinds of future-violent-gore art, and who even brought the Alien alien to (movie)reality. It's all bones bones and guts and guns and glamour, actually. Totally makes sense. Oh, and he worked on a few other movies, like, AH, LEVEL FOUR! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?
LEVEL FOUR: Killer Condom
[van is falling, a joke goes too far]
Or has it? This movie is about the killer of male private parts, which is pretty reminiscent of the more recent [WHY IS THE VAN STILL FALLING]
LEVEL FIVE: Teeth
The themes of sexual liberation and self-hate are SO CONFUSING at this point. I can't tell if Gaga is a lover of horror films or just likes the power she yields over frightened, uncomfortable people. I've brought my boots for both camps, FYI, but, wait, what about that Gaga song....
LEVEL SIX: Lady Gaga's Teeth song
[Obviously, at this point in the movie, I'm lost at the absurdity of people who do the sleep-tripping thing "NOT TO SLEEP, BUT TO WAKE UP", so I'm fuzzy on the plot details at what actually happens in the movie I'm laughing so hard. ]
"Teeth" is one of my favorite Gaga songs because of its honest assertion that she does not want your money, she just wants your sex. It's direct, I can tap my toe to the beat, and the vision of someone else showing me their "teeth" is a hilariously grusome metaphor for their thang...and it makes me giggle my entire way out of this post!
[END INCEPTION JOKE]
I think my point is this: Both Lady Gaga AND Joseph Gordon-Levitt are sexual beasts, and they were born this way. Baby.